Maternity Experience

Language

Keeping the difficult conversations going in the pandemic

We recently ran a virtual Whose Shoes? event around baby loss, in conjunction with Gloucestershire maternity team and Sands bereavement charity. It was originally planned as the second of a 2-part event to use Whose Shoes to test out the ‘National Bereavement Care Pathway’ (NBCP) and identify any gaps.

‘Event 1’ went ahead on 6 March 2020, in Colchester …

The Colchester event was extremely powerful, with a lot of buzz in the room, hugs, good support and some powerful outcomes.
That sadly feels like a different world now, doesn’t it?

Anna Geyer, Director of New Possibilities, made this film of the event:

‘Event 2’ in Gloucestershire was meant to follow a couple of weeks later, but we all know what happened in the meantime. Covid struck and it took us 10 months to work our way through how to run an event of this importance and this sensitivity online.

I will fast forward and bypass how we developed #VirtualWhoseShoes, and all the twists and turns along the way …

Suffice to say that it was thanks to the dedication and perseverance of everybody that we managed to make the event happen. Dawn Morrall, Assistant Director of Midwifery & Nursing and the Clinical Improvement Lead of the South West Clinical Network, checked out the emerging virtual experience, and insisted that it should remain as a Whose Shoes event.

Dawn is one of the people who really ‘gets’ Whose Shoes. Dawn also has a great track record of following up on the quality improvement actions in order to get the most from the events … so we love working with the team in Gloucestershire!

I am hoping Dawn will write a case study about the outcomes from our previous events – and from this one in due course!

Online sessions take a huge amount of preparation. We had a lot of supporters, both in the room and following us on Twitter. #FabObs Flo Wilcock, consultant obstetrician, and Marc Harder had been the people who originally initiated the events:

Despite detailed preparation over many months, we didn’t really know how many people to expect, or the mix of people. Healthcare professionals are obviously so busy at the moment, with the pressures on the NHS due to COVID; people are feeling isolated during lockdown and missing the normal support available from family and friends. They are also ‘Zoomed out’, as the pandemic drags on.

It is hard for any new parents / parents-to-be at the moment, let alone people experiencing bereavement, so it was wonderful that Kerri and many others were keen to join. THANK YOU!

I was amazed. We had about 60 people on the call. It was wonderful and very moving to see so many bereaved parents joining us, alongside healthcare professionals, chaplains, people from SANDS, volunteers, medical photographers, a GP, a funeral director, and many more…

We started off with a gentle activity – colouring! It helps people learn Zoom skills that we then use later in the session to annotate certain screens.
But it also feels relaxed, encourages people to turn on their mics and speak, adds a bit of colour and creativity and helps set the right tone for the session.

Coproduction in action – colouring the Welcome screen!

Clare Worgan from Sands (stepping in for Marc Harder, who has championed this work – get well soon, Marc!) gave a wonderful introduction about the National Bereavement Care Pathway, sharing many links and resources, including NBCP e-learning modules. A bereaved mum herself, Clare is passionate about bereavement care. Her authenticity and keenness to help others shone through.

And then a very moving introduction from Deborah Lee, the Chief Executive. Again Deb spoke from the heart, welcoming everyone to the session but also embodying our #NoHierarchyJustPeople mantra by sharing her lived experience story of baby loss.

It was wonderful that she was able to prioritise sharing this vulnerability and helping others, alongside juggling vital meetings to run the hospital!
We all really appreciated it and it set the context for the event perfectly.
Deb has generously given us permission to share her talk, as appropriate, at any future sessions too.

It was very moving to hear Deb talk about her experience of losing two babies before she went on to have healthy children, now teenagers. All birth stories are important. Hearing Deb remembering so clearly the things that made her experience better or worse, just as vibrantly as a mum talking about a very recent birth experience, brings home just how important things such as language, compassion, ‘personalise rather than medicalise’, and the other key themes of our #MatExp work really are.

Whose Shoes is constantly evolving. It is all crowdsourced by real people and their experiences.

Would you want to hear a group of student medics standing at the end of your bed, referring to you as ‘an interesting case’, as you come to terms with the loss of your child?

Would you want to receive a stark letter telling you not to get pregnant again until you come into the hospital to discuss your case … especially if you are already pregnant?

It is fantastic that we have been able to suggest practical solutions, such as the example set by Leigh Kendall, working with Kingston Hospital and St George’s, where sadly her baby son Hugo lived and died, to write more empathetic letters to bereaved parents. Please check out #HugosLegacy.

You can read the other ‘Nobody’s patient’ case studies here: http://www.londonscn.nhs.uk/publication/maternity-co-designed-case-studies-nobodys-patient/

Leigh inspired the work we did around neonatal care, one of the three key themes of #NobodysPatient.

Here is Leigh’s very moving blog, reflecting on our #NobodysPatient workshop at St George’s hospital:

Catherine MacLennan, another bereaved mum, was similarly the catalyst for our innovative work around second trimester loss, which is sadly an area of care that is missed out from many ‘pathways’.

I am always in awe of how many bereaved parents use their grief to create something so positive.

We had the privilege of welcoming about 15 passionate bereaved parents/ couples in Gloucestershire, reaching out to help others. Many of them spoke about special people who had helped them along the way – “life savers” is a word frequently used. It reminded me of Catherine’s ‘special people’ poem.


Catherine’s ‘Special People poem’ reaching paramedics at London Ambulance Service

Something that I found particularly moving in our Gloucestershire event, was a mother talking about how, when her baby was sadly stillborn, she had made small matching dolls, one to place inside the child’s coffin and one to hang on the Christmas tree as a symbol of hope and for any subsequent children to enjoy and get to know and love their sibling.

We had some fantastic conversations around how best to help people remember their babies and how this might change according to the stage of pregnancy at which the loss occurred.

I have been able to follow this up, as part of my own personal pledge, by linking wonderful peer support people doing great work in this area.

Gill Phillips linking Lauraine, founder of ‘Shine’ and Leanne , founder of ‘By Your Side’.

Watch this space for further links between Lauraine Cheesman (Shine, Gloucs) and Leanne Howlett (By Your Side, Warwickshire)!
I really love making these links!

There were so many thought-provoking conversations, sparking the ‘lemon lightbulbs’ that stay with people and change practice.

Would you want the doctor’s comment on your sicknote to simply say ‘Depression’ when you have just lost your child, without consulting you?

How would you feel having to handle this when you talk to your employer, sometimes without maternity leave if your pregnancy ends before 24 weeks?

These are just a small sample of the situations people are regularly facing.

Conversely, we heard how staff are generally extremely compassionate, and what a difference this can make, including giving people the courage to get pregnant again and try for ‘that happy ending’.

As always, we used a variety of scenarios and poems to generate the conversations to explore people’s experiences and how services and support could be improved. Bereavement midwife, Nikki Dobson proved to be a superstar. She and her colleagues had put in so much time to do a gap analysis, identifying areas where feedback suggested improvements could be made.

We wanted to get the most out of the opportunity afforded by bringing all these wonderful people from different perspectives together. The team had identified key themes and we selected the most relevant Whose Shoes scenarios accordingly, including:

• Some areas in fetal loss / medicine identified as needing improvement
• Care after discharge
• Delivery suite gap analysis
• Antenatal screening – support for families in future pregnancies
• Ultrasound
• GPs
• Supporting dads and partners

Nikki writes wonderful poems and she generously read two of them live during our session. We have always used poems as a way of connecting with people differently in our WhoseShoes sessions.


As always, Anna’s images were superb – and all the more so, being able to capture the conversations live during the session, just as we do ‘in the room’. Sometimes we have the opportunity of a visual learning synthesis too, but each event is different.

You can read Anna’s reflections here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/hearing-voices-bereaved-families-anna-geyer/

It is totally draining facilitating these online sessions but incredibly rewarding. The chat in the Zoom ‘chat room’ was phenomenal – full of wonderful insights, comments and useful links. The atmosphere was warm and supportive. We were able to ‘save’ the chat in all its richness, as another output from the session to feed into the continuing quality improvement journey.

The outcomes are extraordinary and just as powerful as any other events that we run.

And, of course, for all events the most important outcomes happen later – people following through and implementing their pledges, connecting, building the momentum for positive change.

I collated as many of the pledges and specific improvement ideas from the session as I could. SO many. This does not mean that the bereavement care in Gloucestershire is poor. On the contrary, it means they are open to genuine coproduction, listening and finding out how they can make their service even better.

The praise – and indeed love – for Nikki, Dawn, the medical photographers, fetal medicine staff and many others was incredibly strong . I was moved by everyone’s determination to work together and support each other.

There seems to be a lot of interest in Whose Shoes around how we can better support parents and families suffering baby loss, building further on the various maternity projects we have done, which Colchester, Gloucestershire and about 70 other NHS trusts have used so powerfully in quality improvements.

Next stop, Lincolnshire? A few of their team joined the Gloucestershire session, which is always the best way to learn about
Whose Shoes and build the networks. We’ve done some great work with Lincs before!

The energy is growing

Since the Gloucestershire event, I have had several extraordinary opportunities to join conversations, hear different perspectives and ensure that our Whose Shoes material remains topical, authentic and able to spark the understanding that is needed.

I was privileged to join a very powerful and informative Zoom session, led by paula abramson Alex Mancini-Smith and Nadia Leake .

Bereavement Training International – Bereavement counsellor training for groups at their place of employment

Wonderful staff from the South-West neonatal teams came together to learn more about baby loss and its impact, and Nadia courageously shared her lived experience story, helping people understand the special grief and complexity of losing one or more babies in multiple pregnancy.
I recommend this training highly to all involved in perinatal care.

I also joined a webinar hosted by Kathy Fray in New Zealand, with guest speaker Joann O’Leary talking with huge insight about pregnancy after loss, another complex ‘taboo’ topic which is not discussed enough.

I am being asked about some of the ‘end of life care’ / palliative care work we have done in other areas – eg with London Ambulance Service. I am having some interesting conversations with People from NHS England / Improvement at the moment about how all of this work could be better supported.

I am currently supporting a wonderful doctor, Nikki Crowley, to implement Family Integrated Care in a London hospital; the #NobodysPatient resources will be central to our collaboration. Networking is proving super important here, as some wonderful people come together to help.

And … latest news … we are currently looking at innovative ways to help people follow up Whose Shoes pledges, if things get ‘stuck’ in any way, using #LiberatingStructures. With thanks to Lyse Edwards. Contact me @WhoseShoes if you want to know more.

So, lots happening. But it is only be happening because PEOPLE are stepping forward to make a difference, which is hugely rewatding.

I will leave you with a fantastic quote from Nadia Peake, the bereaved mum of twin baby Raif, who stole the show at the South West Neonatal event.

“The situation is bad.
The experience doesn’t have to be”

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Episode 38. A New Year. Ethics. Storytelling. Networks …

I don’t write blogs very often these days but sometimes, with just too many thoughts going round in my head, it is good to get it all down on paper. Or on a screen.

So please forgive/enjoy this stream of consciousness …

I have been an avid follower of Florence Wilcox’s fabulous podcast series, ‘The Obs Pod’. It is a year now since #FabObs Flo, my #MatExp partner in crime, first told me about the idea, having been inspired by meeting Natalie Silverman @fertilitypoddy at a conference, and I have been privileged to have pre-hears of the weekly editions.

Each one resonates with me in a different way. It might be my own birth experiences (yes, they stay with you for all those years) and now a proud Granny, or hearing Flo talk about her perspective on topics we have addressed through our #MatExp Whose Shoes work. The podcasts always give me deeper understanding of Flo’s thinking and what drives her in her mission to listen, learn and blend all the nuances of lived experience into her medical training and experiences as a doctor.

Anyway, the current episode ‘Ethics’ about the interface between medicine and what has traditionally been referred to as ‘fetal anomalies’ – a baby! – brought a flood of associations, memories and emotions. In particular, I thought of the wonderful network of people I have come to know and love over the last couple of decades. I felt proud that we have been able to contribute to a more human approach, with better information and choice for families from the point at which they are told that their baby has a higher chance of having Down syndrome; and then quality of life and acceptance and joy for growing families. This #TheObsPod episode brings together so many things for me.

Mel Smith and Grapevine are friends I have known for many years. Indeed, I attended their 25 year celebration (thankfully before the pandemic curtailed such activities).

Mel wrote ‘Imagine’, a fabulous poem about her relationship with her son Rishard as a very powerful contribution to our Whose Shoes event with the Coventry & Warwickshire maternity team in 2018. Hearing Mel read it here at the end of Flo’s podcast is just wonderful. I have followed Rishard’s progress and his dream to become an actor … including now starring in the BBC Doctors series!

I know/know of other young actors with Down syndrome. What progress they have all made over the last couple of years! Big shoutout to George Webster, starring in S.A.M and challenging societal stereotypes, including sexuality and learning disability.

I was invited to the Premiere in London of ‘The Peanut Butter Falcon’, for which Zack Gottsagen made Academy Awards history by becoming the first person with Down Syndrome to present the Best Live Action Short Film on The Oscars (2020). Such films really help people understand and embrace diversity, in all its many facets.

I was sad not to be able to go to the Premiere. And then in January 2020, I spotted the film in the film library on my way to New Zealand and it passed a very happy hour – a bit of a trip of a lifetime, just before the world went so pear-shaped. All these memories and associations come back by listening to a podcast on Ethics!

Enjoying Queenstown, New Zealand, before the world turned upside down in 2020!

Of the friends with Down Syndrome I have met through Grapevine, I must give a special shoutout to Heidi Crowter @HeidiCrowter95. Heidi is smashing stigma and stereotypes with her steely determination, resilience, courage, perseverance, joy, infectious giggle and firm belief that we can all achieve our dreams.

Heidi was a star of our #CovMindTheGap the movie’ film, which tells the story of our famous (infamous?) #CovMindTheGap workshop. So-called ‘hard-to-reach’ people queued at the door, took a full part in our Whose Shoes discussions before coming on our ‘Magic Mile’ walk. Complete with storytelling, dancing and singing in the streets of Coventry, this was one to remember.

Oh and by the way, Heidi got married last year – as people with Down syndrome do.

Congratulations again Heidi and James – keep rocking it and end #Downrightdiscrimination.

… Thinking of Coventry, my mind wanders back to ‘Our stories’ – my favourite-ever project in all my (#eek 30!) years working in social care in Coventry.

Authentic story telling – quite a story! I’ll keep it for my book …

My passion for personalisation was kindled by this project. We helped people with very complex needs to reclaim their lives through the choice and control afforded by personal budgets. We were successful in helping people to move back from extremely expensive (public services perspective) and miserable (citizen perspective – far from my family) ‘out of city’ placements. Unleashing this personal genie was a key trigger to me jumping ship from my day job to set up Whose Shoes.

I have a few spare copies of ‘Our Stories’ and have just sent a copy to Ghislaine Smith. Ghislaine is one of the current Darzi Fellows, doing a project in London to reduce the number of out of area placements for children and young people in care in the North West London. I met her at a #VirtualWhoseShoes session we ran in November 2020 with her #Darzi12 cohort. I find it fascinating how these different projects and connections wander into each other over so many years. I hope the booklet will be useful in some way, but learning from people’s stories never goes out of date.

… The local, regional, national and indeed international (especially now with such easy connectivity online) weaving effortlessly together …

Then there are all the friends I have met and experiences I have enjoyed through Nicola Enoch, Founder of Positive About Down Syndrome (PADS). I first met Nicola Enoch a few years ago when she attended our Whose Shoes workshop in Warwick. Well, what an amazing woman and story!

Nicola gave me a leaflet but I said it would have more impact if we took a photo and posted it on social media. I have since smiled seeing so many similar photos with movers and shakers in the maternity world: people Nicola has met through the #MatExp community. Nicola knows how to network and make things happen!

Nicola has helped me take forward work I started with Lewisham and Greenwich NHS Trust. Working with this innovative maternity team, led by Helen Knower, we had developed Whose Shoes scenarios exploring language used by healthcare professionals and experiences of parents and parents-to be around screening of Down Syndrome. Nicola became a huge champion of this work and attended a workshop with them.

Now Nicola and I plot and plan how we can best use our combined networks and resources to spread this thinking:
Over 70 NHS trusts now have Whose Shoes #MatExp resources.
Nicola has a vast network of parents across the country.
We aim to get parents working with midwives, learning from lived experience, in more and more parts of the country.

We held a #DownSyndrome specific event with the maternity and neonatal teams at Coventry and Warwickshire NHS and have also been successful in inviting parents of children with Down Syndrome to join ALL our #MatExp #WhoseShoes workshops, meaning this important perspective is regularly heard.

A highlight was when Colette Lloyd, an amazing Mum who spearheaded a campaign to re-think negative language around Down syndrome attended our Whose Shoes workshop with Barts Health NHS Trust. She caused so many ‘lemon lightbulb’ moments that she was invited to stay and run some training that afternoon.

Sarah-Jane Pedler


Teams like the maternity team in Cornwall, who really get Whose Shoes, have similarly done wonderful work in this area. I love following what they get up to in Cornwall. Sarah-Jane Pedler, a truly inspirational Professional Midwifery Ambassador and … well, everyone really (it is true coproduction) … hold an annual Whose Shoes workshop focusing on a different topic each time.

Angie Emrys-Jones @LookingUpBooks, who has a child with Down Syndrome,  is Book Lead at Cornwall Down Syndrome Support Group. She has sent me some beautiful books. I’m sure they must massively help those they are designed for – reassuring images and stories about ‘Going to School’, and helping grandparents (‘Tea at Grandma’s’) and so much more.

It is lovely when people send me these fabulous packages. Another last year was from Nicola : the wonderful crowdsourced #NobodyToldMe book, full of positive images and stories of children with Down Syndrome. Flo refers to this in her podcast.

I knew Nicola‘s dream was to be able to influence the RCOG. How brilliant would it be to help shape doctors’ thinking right from the beginning of their obstetric journey!

Florence Wilcock introduces the Whose Shoes ‘Ethics’ session at the RCOG

Florence managed to get us a Whose Shoes training session with doctors at the RCOG. These people have huge influence in life and death decisions but may never have actually met a child or adult with Down Syndrome. Nicola embraced the opportunity to talk to them about the issues raised through the different Whose Shoes scenarios.

What a revelation to see issues through the eyes of a proud parent of a lively teenager, who happens tp have Down Syndrome!

Nicola invited me to speak at her wonderful national conference for parents of children with Down Syndrome. Most of the speakers were parents; the agenda was packed. Every 15 minutes, a new (equally inspirational!) speaker! These people were wall-to-wall passion, leading initiatives and campaigns‘ (Don’t screen us out!’ and so many more). The energy of this #JFDI parents’ conference and the quality of the presenters will stay with me, which sadly is not the case for many far more expensive professional conferences I have attended … and indeed forgotten.

DS – Nicola’s conference 1
DS – Nicola’s conference 2
DS – Nicola’s conference 3 – Verity1
DS – Nicola’s conference 3 – Verity2
DS – Nicola’s conference 3 – Verity3
DS – Nicola’s conference 5
DS – Nicola’s conference 6 – Lynn Murray 1
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DS – Nicola’s conference 8 – Lynn Murray 3
DS – Nicola’s conference 9 – socks
DS – Nicola’s conference 9 Lucienne Cooper – socks
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I have enjoyed networking with these parents. Meeting them in person around the country (and now joining our #VirtualWhoseShoes sessions). Lynn Murray @LynnAMurray joined the workshop up in Dundee. Colette Lloyd @ColetteLloyd joined our workshop in Barts in London, and immediately got invited to take part in some training that afternoon.

Sarah Sutton @peaponderer sang our #MatExp the Musical ‘Better births are here to stay’ song with us in Surrey using Makaton, while Caspar @N_Down_A_Caspar came along with his mum and stole the show.

And then the new passion emerging through all of this. Seeing student midwife, Verity Lancaster @LancasterVerity, student of the year 2019, giving up her Sunday to travel to the Midlands to speak at Nichola’s conference, talking about the work we first started at Lewisham and Greenwich and how it inspired her to lead in this area. Hearing her humility (‘just a student midwife’) but with more understanding and compassion than many far more experienced people; speaking from the heart.

Being able to draw on this fantastic network of people and help showcase what they are doing is an ongoing journey. During the pandemic, Nicola‘s daughter Emily set up online sessions for her brother Tom and his friends, to reduce social isolation during the pandemic. These have now spread nationally.

We were delighted to help promote Emily’s sessions through the ‘Building the future’ #VirtualWhoseShoes work we did during the summer of 2020 and also in our recent Advent series.

I was privileged to support Nicola giving her Ted talk: ‘How I nearly terminated my son through ignorance‘. A powerful title – an even more powerful talk.

I am now linking busy Nicola into discussions I am holding with ‘Wave for Change’, a wonderful organisation in London who are enabling people with and without learning disabilities to socialise together as equals. Which links back to my early connections with Grapevine Coventry, because it that is what they have always done.

And it was Claire Flower, a music therapist at Chelsea and Westminster hospital, who led the music extravaganza in #MatExp the Musical, on the main stage at NHS Expo, who introduced me to them.

Another inspirational mother is my friend Yvonne Newbold @YvonneNewbold – so much so, she was awarded an MBE in the New Years Honours list! Check out her webinars and her book, both of which help thousands of parents of children with special needs: The Special Parents Handbook.

And the networking continues … Dancing brings joy!

Always good to hear from Community Catalysts! I joined their session in September …

… and they contributed a wonderful video about ‘The Buzz’ for our advent series.

In fact we all love Community Catalysts!! They make a lot of people very happy – like Grapevine and Wave for Change, helping people with and without learning disabilities to have fun together. True inclusion.

It is great to see that Mel, Nicola and Yvonne have all endorsed Flo’s podcast episode on Ethics, saying that she has tackled a very sensitive topic in a compassionate, informative and non-judgemental way.

Bridging the gap between services and people; shifting the power dynamics, promoting inclusion in the widest sense.

Yes, a lot of thoughts have been triggered by Episode 38.

Flo’s podcast has got off to a brilliant start in 2020, with thousands of downloads. I hope in 2021, it will become the go-to resource, with people not only subscribing to each week’s episode, but also dipping into all the richness that has already been created around a very human approach to obstetrics and maternity experience.

I am privileged to be part of this vibrant community focusing on what matters to people … which is really all that matters. Join us!

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DS – Nicola at UHCW Coventry workshop IMG_2582
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Don’t forget the Dads – Copy
Compassion targets – Copy
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The Obs Pod

So here it is! I am so excited to support Florence Wilcock, a.k.a. #FabObs Flo to launch her innovative podcast: ‘The Obs Pod’.

Flo’s podcast

Flo’s padlet helping you browse the key topics

Ever since Flo first phoned me, back in 2014, asking ‘if Whose Shoes would work in maternity services’, I have been impressed by her person-centred approach, her ability to challenge the status quo and push boundaries and to work WITH women and families. She lives and breathes her powerful ‘Wrong is wrong …’ mantra.

The Obs Pod’ will appeal to everyone who has an interest in maternity services. Everyone will be able to take something away from each episode, due to Flo’s wide-ranging experience, gentle reflective style and ground-breaking practice.

Gill Phillips, Creator of Whose Shoes? and co-founder, with Flo, of the #MatExp social movement

As a young Mum who was totally blown away by the inspirational obstetricians who delivered my baby nearly two years ago, I am excited to start following ‘The Obs Pod’. The first episode was fantastic; so interesting and captivating. I am sure the podcast will be hugely popular with pregnant women and maternity staff alike, along with so many other people who will find it fascinating to gain an insight into the thoughts and experiences of someone who shares the beauty and intimacy of pregnancy and birth as part of their working life.

Jenny Thirlwall, young Mum and member of #MatExp community,
West Midlands

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One of the things I have enjoyed the most over the last five years of #MatExp is the opportunity to get creative. From being ‘just’ an obstetrician, I have branched out and added: writer, poet, facilitator, film maker, speaker, campaigner to name just a few new skills.

Gill encouraged me to write a blog. I promised my husband it would be just the one, resulting in a nickname now from Gill ‘One blog Flo’. as I have lost count now of how many I have actually written after dipping my toe in the water.

I’ve enjoyed making Steller stories after a quick demo on a train journey, particularly our #MatExpAdvent series and my Nobody’s Patient monthly project reports. I have made videos, my contribution to our series for #MindNBody launch being one of my favourites, reading my poem ‘Reassured’. All this is alongside my day job and I find these creative outlets re-energise me, develop me and feedback into my day to day working in maternity care.

In December, I was lucky enough to meet Natalie Silverman @FertilityPoddy at RCOG women’s network meeting in Manchester. https://www.thefertilitypodcast.com/ She talked enthusiastically about podcasting. She made it sound both interesting and achievable. Something that wasn’t too challenging but that might reach a different audience. She was inspiring and willing to offer advice. I went home enthused.

I spent the next couple of months thinking and exploring, I decided I have things I would like to share. Adam Kay’s book ‘This is going to hurt’ has been a runaway success, but I want to voice a different perspective of the maternity world. One that would be accessible to women and staff alike. One that might ignite change and action as well as entertain. So, I have rolled up my sleeves, listened to a podcast series on making a podcast, taught myself the lingo, attempted the editing and technical bits and loved every minute.

So here goes, I am launching my next adventure:
The Obs Pod.
I hope you enjoy listening as much as I am enjoying making it!

Flo

Here are the episodes so far and new ones will automatically be added here. If you wish to access the programme notes Florence refers to each week, find the episode you are interested in on The Obs Pod (buzzsprout.com):

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#MatExp Whose Shoes? update

Some really exciting developments with #MatExp Whose Shoes? at the moment.

Bromley MSLC produced a ‘one year on’ report following up on their Whose Shoes? workshop at King’s College hospital using “I said, I did” as a framework to list all the fantastic outcomes that had come from pledges made on the day.

Language continues to be a big issue for women and families, but some great initiatives are now happening. Building on the Whose Shoes? workshops, Leeds and Colchester in particular are working on specific language challenges. I came up with a ‘Negativity Bingo’ and had great fun with my team at the NHS Fab Change Day #DoAthOn event launching #DumptheDaftWords.

I have been getting some exciting invitations to speak about building social movements and of course gave #MatExp a big shout out in my talk at the launch of #AHPsIntoAction, they have invited me back for a longer keynote session at their annual conference in June.

More hospitals are coming on board with the Whose Shoes? approach – the energy is particularly strong in London, the West Midlands and the South West regions. It has been great to present on several occasions now with Catherine MacLennan and Emma Jane Sasaru and to see people learning so much from their courageous sharing of their lived experience.

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Last Friday, 3 Feb 2017, we were invited to present a #MatExp Whose Shoes? session to get some good discussions going as part of a packed event launching #PanStaffsMTP in Stafford. We concentrated specifically on continuity and perinatal mental health. This is the county-wide transformation programme to improve maternity experience in Staffordshire to implement the national ‘Better Births’ vision. This informal film gives you a flavour.

We are proud of the crowdsourced ‘Nobody’s Patient’ project and thank everyone for your fantastic contributions. We now have over 120 new Whose Shoes? scenarios and poems and the new resources will be made available shortly to all the hospitals who were existing customers. Florence Wilcock, Sam Frewin and I are finalising the supporting toolkit and collating the case studies, ahead of our ‘wrap up’ event in March. We are trying to pull together lots of ideas for positive change, with or without a workshop. I hope you are enjoying the regular Steller stories, including Florence’s monthly reports.

Wonderful to see everyone doing such amazing work, speaking all over the place, building networks, spreading the word and generally making great things happen.

Keep up the good work!

Gill Phillips @Whose Shoes

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Excessive Crying – What’s The Right Response?

Our thanks to Sally Hogg for this blog post.  Sally is a mother who works in children’s policy, research and practice, and has done extensive work on the subject of excessive crying in infants.

Sal
Sally Hogg, @salhogg

All babies cry and some babies cry a lot; between 10 and 20 per cent of babies will cry excessively during the first three months of life. As professionals, we know that this crying is normal and will pass. But for parents it is tough. Really tough.

“There were times when I resented him for screaming, and then hated myself for feeling like that, and also for not being able to make it better. I just felt a huge sense of failure.”

While most families survive a period of excessive crying relatively unscathed, it does increase the risk of a range of poor outcomes including maternal mental illness, relationship breakdown, child abuse and childhood behavioural problems.

Parents of babies who cry a lot will often try to identify a cause of this crying, and, with it, a solution. This isn’t helped by the fact that excessive crying is generally known as ‘colic’, leading to the common misconception that it is caused by stomach problems. In fact, excessive crying has been shown to be associated with digestive problems in only a small subgroup (around 5-10 per cent) of babies who cry excessively. For other babies, the causes of excessive crying might include temperament, early sensitivity, feeding problems, or a poor fit between parenting expectations and behaviours and babies’ needs. For many babies, we will never really know why they cry a lot.

Crying is one of the most common reasons that parents seek support in the postnatal period. In these situations, it can be tempting to suggest a ‘cure’ for the crying, or to reassure the parent that crying is normal. Both the academic evidence, and the experience of parents, tell us that neither response is appropriate.

It is not appropriate to simply suggest a cure for the crying – whether that be winding, infancol, changes to feeding, or actions like walking the baby in a pram or carrying him. These actions might work for some babies, but not for all. There is no ‘one size fits all’ solution to crying – all babies are different and can cry for a huge number of different reasons, requiring different responses.

It is also not appropriate simply to reassure parents that crying will pass. Even if the crying is normal and the baby fine, excessive crying is hugely difficult for parents and can damage their self-esteem, self-efficacy, mental health and wider wellbeing. So some form of response is required.

So what might an appropriate response to excessive crying be?

Based on a review of the evidence, and in particular a useful article by Ian St James Roberts I would suggest that a good response to excessive crying has six parts. These are set out below. I’ve also highlighted where we might take action in the antenatal period to prepare parents to cope with a crying baby.

  1. Building awareness of babies’ development.

The first three months of a child’s life (sometimes called the ‘fourth trimester) is a distinct phase of babies’ development, in which they are not yet able to regulate themselves, and in which their crying has particular characteristics. Ronald Barr refers to the ‘period of purple crying’, where the acronym ‘purple’ describes different features of babies’ early crying.

Supporting all parents – both antenatally and postnatally – to understand this developmental stage, and to know that it will pass, can be really helpful. (Although there isn’t a magic transition point at three months and each stage of children’s development brings new and different challenges, so it’s important to manage parent’s expectations!)

  1. Help parents to understand the stress that they feel and how to cope with this.

It is normal for parents to find their baby’s crying stressful, but hard to admit this. We can help parents by normalising this experience, making it acceptable to talk about how one feels when a baby cries, and helping parents to think about ways to deal with this. Evidence shows that giving parents coping strategies to deal with the stress they feel when their baby cries, together with educating them about the importance of not shaking baby, can help parents and reduce the risk of abuse to babies. The NSPCC’s Coping with Crying Programme has shown the value of sharing these messages with parents in the antenatal and postnatal period.

  1. Provide a menu of options

There are many reasons why a baby might cry and many ways to help babies to keep calm, or to soothe them when they cry. These could be shared with parents antenatally, to help provide them with a ‘toolkit’ to draw from when their baby cries.

When a baby is crying excessively, it is useful to help parents to consider their own baby’s experiences and needs, and to identify what actions might help them. Evidence from successful interventions suggests that the most effective responses to excessive crying involve reassuring and supporting parents, and helping them to formulate hypotheses about why the baby is crying and identify and test actions to reduce their babies’ crying or to make it feel more manageable. One intervention, Possums, uses five domains – infant health, mother health, feeding, sensations and sleep – to consider the families’ needs and identify actions.

  1. Help parents to enjoy their baby.

When a baby cries excessively, this understandably becomes the focus of parents’ attention. But the perinatal period is a formative time when parents develop beliefs about their child’s personality which can influence how they interpret and respond to the child’s behaviour and the quality of their interactions. It is therefore important to highlight a babies’ wider characteristics, and help parents to enjoy the positive interactions that they have with their baby so that they don’t develop too negative an image of their child based on their crying.

  1. Frame crying as an experience and not a symptom.

It is helpful to address the idea that crying is a sign that there is something ‘wrong’ with the baby, either physiologically or emotionally. Helping parents to see excessive crying as a part of their baby’s experience of early life, rather than a symptom of a medical problem or a sign of poor behaviour, can help them to focus on how best to soothe their baby and cope with crying during this stage.

  1. Be Kind.

Finally, let’s not forget that excessive crying is really hard, and parents can feel feelings of isolation, helplessness and failure. These mums and dads need a kind, compassionate response and ongoing support.

“More helpful still were the very few people at health clinics who bothered to learn my or my babies’ name, who offered to hold him for a little bit, and who were interested in how I was doing. These people were few and far between.”

Sally Hogg

2016

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Top Ten Things NOT To Say To A Preemie Parent

Language is a huge theme for #MatExp, and one of our six Heart Values.  Francesca Tucker kindly agreed to write this post for us looking at people’s inadvertent language trip ups when talking to parents of premature babies.  Francesca is a part-time working Mum, who lives in the New Forest with her husband Murray, baby Harry and their three cats. Harry was born at 28 weeks, whilst his parents were on holiday in France. He’s now a happy, healthy 18 month old!

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As I sit and write this now, I can do it with a smile on my face.  But 18 months ago, if you’d said any of the following “Top 10” to me, my reaction would have been vastly different.  Depending on how my day had gone / how many Brady’s baby Harry had decided to scare us with / how much milk I’d managed to express etc., you may have had a response of tears, anger or stony silence. Because, quite frankly, there are just some things you don’t say to the parent of a premature baby!

Speaking on behalf of “The Premature Club” which no-one wants membership to, we understand that it’s difficult to know what to say.  The pure joy of the newborn news is tinged by the elephant in the room- “what if they don’t make it”?  We know that as our family, friends and loved ones you are thinking of us (we do appreciate it!) and you want to say the right thing, but we’re not expecting you to – there are no magic words that will break the spell and make everything better.  Just being there for us, letting us cry, shout, or just sit in silence helps.  And that silence can be golden – far better than the following “Top 10 Things not to say to a Preemie Parent”! (As compiled by myself and another Prem-Mum whilst we were in neonatal, both with boobs out, trying to get our babies to practice their breastfeeding!)…..

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1. You’re lucky!  You got to meet your baby early!

Yep, at this time, we’re feeling really lucky-said no-one EVER!  Last time I checked, there was no calendar hung in my uterus, so I’m pretty sure the baby had no concept of ETAs.

2. Your baby was just keen to meet you.

I was creating quite a nice little home in my womb which I was quite proud of- food on demand, good thermostat, nice sounds, and a lovely landlady who was providing everything.  I think my baby was quite happy to stay put for a while longer, and wasn’t that eager to meet me. He/she had heard me chatting enough already, so I’m pretty sure the baby knew me already!

3. Oooh, having such a small baby must have made labour easy!

Putting aside the obvious fact that childbirth is painful, what a lot of people forget is that Prems often arrive in emergency situations. This may involve tearing, C-sections, episiotomies as well as the wider delivery tool-kit of forceps, ventouse etc.  This is NOT easy! (And don’t even get me started on the emotional aspects of labour)

4. Lucky you!  You’ve got less baby weight to lose!

Why is it that when someone has a baby, everyone feels it’s acceptable to start commenting on your weight?!  It’s no-one else’s business that you weigh, it’s the last thing on your mind whilst listening to the endless beeping in neonatal. And chances are that with the stress of the situation, you’ll be losing weight anyway

5. Well, at least with the baby in hospital, you get a good night’s sleep!

Erm, no!!  At night, most Prem parents are trying to cram in a day’s work of general life into a couple of hours (unfortunately bills still need to be paid, housework done etc.), prepare supplies that need to go to the hospital the next day, express milk through the night to keep supply up, and are generally stressing.  A good night sleep is not anticipated for months!

6. With those nurses around, you’re getting far more support than most Mums.

Yes, the nurses are a fantastic support (they become your extended family!), and it’s a hard job to do, but they are by no means doing it single-handedly.  They encourage the parents to get involved wherever and whenever possible. I can’t think of many parents that have a baby just to hand them over to someone else to look after – you are the parents, and you want the job!  But also remember, the medical team is desperately needed- many Prems need a lot of medical support…surely no-one can begrudge a baby that?!

7. But tiny babies are so cute!

True, but would you swap your baby being dangerously small for “cute”?  I thought not.  And trying to find the “adorably small” premature outfits is tricky…and very expensive!

8. When will the baby be coming home?

We don’t know, and if we do, we often won’t want to say.  It is upsetting thinking you’re about to take your baby home, only for your child to take a downturn and your excitement turns to disappointment and fear.  Sometimes it’s easier for the parents to say nothing, rather than having to explain why the baby is remaining in hospital.  And when we finally take our little family home, we may well want a day or two to take it all in-it’s a long journey to get home!

9. How are you doing?

Mmmm, a tricky one.  Some days will be good, some days will be bad.  With 1001 thoughts and emotions running through a Prem parents head, it’ll probably take too long for them to give an honest answer- default option is option to be “Okay, thanks. You?”  A better thing to say if the offering of help for a specific thing e.g. “Would you like me to bring you a meal around, so you don’t need to cook?”

10 Will he/she be okay?

A very personal question, and again one that is completely dependent on individual circumstances.  Define “okay”?  The baby may have long-term health issues, but with the prospect of excellent quality of life, the outlook is overall positive.  Or the baby may be going through a serious complication, where the outcome is an unknown. No-one wants to answer “No, he/she is not okay”, as it’s upsetting for all concerned.  I personally think such questions are best avoided, and simply substituted by as much love and support as you can provide.

Harry

These are some of the favourite options I had for you from our early days of the neonatal journey.  Now, a favourite is “Isn’t he walking yet?” – nope! But bear in mind, his peers have a 3month developmental head-start!  Maybe I should do a Top 10 comments for the “Advancing Prem Baby”?!……….

But to anyone reading this, currently supporting a neonatal family – thank you.  Even though the family may not show it (they are probably too overwhelmed presently), having you present in their lives is helping them more than you’ll know.  And if you’re the parents of the little baby/babies lying in hospital- I welcome you to “The Premature Club”- it’s tough, and at times you may feel so wholly overwhelmed it can engulf you.  But remember, you are doing a great job and making the best of your situation. I send my love and support to you.

By Rosiepics
Francesca and Harry by Rosiepics

Francesca Tucker

2016

For more “What Not To Say” and other Preemie Top Tens please visit The Smallest Things website.

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WhoseShoes Confirmed That My Shoes Have Climbed A Mountain

This post is from Michelle Quashie, and originally appeared on her blog site Strong Since Birth.  Our thanks to Michelle for agreeing for it to be reposted here.

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The day had finally arrived! After contributing to #MatExp and interacting with many conversations surrounding ‘WhoseShoes’ throughout the year, I was finally going to experience the magic in real life.

Laura, the chair of our MSLC has written a fantastic post that captures the excitement of the day perfectly, you can read it here: When WhoseShoes Came To The PRUH

I was not disappointed, the day was everything I had dreamed of,  but for me it was so much more.

I was asked to open the event by sharing my Maternity Experience. I have spoke at several maternity training events in the past but my audience has always been Midwives. I was aware that this was a multi discipline training event and it was to be the first time I would share my story in such detail with Obstetricians and everyone else involved in Maternity. The thought made me feel anxious but I knew how important this opportunity was.

I had planned to stay in control and not let the emotions attached to my experience be displayed in the form of tears. It was so important to me to remain composed and in control.

My heart pounded through the showing of the MatExp film, this film moves me every time. It is so powerful and very thought provoking. Sadly I can resonate with many of the situations displayed in the film. I knew I was about to be discussing some of those memories any minute with all those surrounding me.

My name was called and I made my way to the front with my heart pounding. I decided to be honest and share how I was feeling with the room.

‘Please bare with me, I am feeling very nervous. I’m sure once I start talking I will warm up and I will be fine!’

Automatically I felt more relaxed and felt more able to share my story without the anxiety overruling my thoughts.

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It’s amazing how every time I share my experience it comes out slightly different, or I find myself saying things that I hadn’t thought of before? I had missed a couple of important bits out but neither the less I was very happy with the way I had presented and gauging by the feeling of emotion in the room I had touched the hearts of nearly everyone around me. For the first time I was able to keep my tears to myself even though I had noted that tears were shed by many in response. The room fell silent but the atmosphere spoke volumes.

I wasn’t aware of the tweets that were being circulated on social media but looking at them them later along with the emails I had received It confirmed that my talk was a positive part of the day.

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“Also a massive well done to Michelle for her heartfelt and emotional story, I could see it touched many people as there were certainly a few tears in the room. That took huge courage to stand there in front of so many people and share such a personal experience and to tell it so well. Huge WELL DONE Michelle.”

We began to play the the game and interesting discussions were had in response to the thought provoking questions that are key to the WhoseShoes success.

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Some of the discussions that stick in my mind were:

  1. A woman wanted a home birth but her husband wasn’t convinced. We had discussed that there wasn’t enough support or information given during antenatal care to ensure that the couple felt safe,supported and empowered to fulfil the woman’s birth choice.
  2. Consultant Obstetricians are normally addressed by other members of their team using their title i.e., Sir, Mr, Mrs or Miss as a mark of respect. I may be wrong but it feels hierarchical, unlike the power slogan and barrier breaker behind WhoseShoes and #MatExp ‘No Hierarchy, just ordinary people’.
  3. It was also discussed that consultants were on site until 9 pm, after that they are on call for emergency situations only. Now I understand why during my appointment to discuss my VBAC, the registrar said ‘ I mean, we don’t know when you will go into labour or who will be on duty should you rupture’. I now understand that my birth choices were  influenced by staffing levels at the hospital.
  4. Other key themes were Empathy, Language, supporting and facilitating informed decision making and just how important it was for everyone to be cared for individually based on their individual situation and needs.
  5. Midwives are able to have time to build a relationship with women whereas doctors are often called for the emergency situation and do their best to resolve the medical issue as it arises. This can sometimes make it hard for them to be able to connect with the woman that they are caring for and are not always able to fully appreciate the long lasting effects the experience can have on a woman.

The day was coming to an end and Anna gave us fabulous evaluation of our morning using the comments that came from the discussion at each table. It was fabulous to visualise the discussion using the graphic that Anna had been working on through out the morning.

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We each made an individual pledges. Here is my pledge:

“To provide a platform for women to share their Maternity experience.  I would like to ensure that women’s voices are heard as part of training and development.”

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I am currently planning a conference called ‘Women’s Voices’. More details will be available soon.

As the morning came to an end and people were leaving someone tapped me on my shoulder. I turned round and my tummy flipped. The face before me took me straight to a place of feeling vulnerable, feeling panicky.

‘Michelle it was me wasn’t it?’

Stood before me was the registrar that I had my consultation for my vba2c with. Unbeknown to my self and the organisers we had shared the morning. I had shared an experience that changed my life but had also been a time that left me feeling scared, vulnerable, isolated and questioning my mental health. The person that was responsible for those feelings was standing here in front of me, for a moment the feelings came flooding back, I battled to keep them contained.

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She apologised for the way she had cared for me. She admitted that she had been wrong and has since ensured that she was fully aware of her professional guidance. She was now fully supportive of  women’s choice regarding their birth and ensured me that since having to write a statement in response to my complaint, she is fully aware of the impact of the care she provides a woman.

She actually thanked me for highlighting the error of her ways promising me it had changed her attitudes. I could see that she was overwhelmed with emotion and had spoke to me honestly. She asked if she could hug me and we both held each other for comfort.

I told her that I admired her for taking the time to come a talk to me and for apologising. I also explained that I was aware that she was not entirely to blame for the care I had received and I now understood that her response to me wanting a vaginal birth after two caesareans was due to the cultural belief of the trust she worked in.

It was clear that my birth wishes would not be supported and neither would anyone wanting to support me at that time. I know this because many attempts were made to provide me with the support I needed and no one stepped out of their comfort zone to provide me with the support I needed with regards me birth choices. As a result I had no choice but to transfer my care.

She empathised and promised me that as a result of my experience things were changing.

We said our goodbyes and I was trying very hard to contain my emotion that the meeting had evoked.

A consultant midwife that has walked by my side through this maternity experience and others and who has been a pillar of support to me came to see me. ‘Are you OK Michelle?’

The flood gates open and I broke down. I couldn’t talk at that moment. I was just overwhelmed with emotion. I couldn’t make sense of it at the time but now I think I can.

That meeting with the registrar brought some closure. I admire her ability to acknowledge the error of her ways.

The meeting took me back and reminded me of the scared women I once was sitting in her office, trying to persuade her that I could give birth, pleading with them to allow me. Feeling so horrible when it was highlighted that I had never given birth and they wasn’t sure if I could. I was subjected to a number of negative comments that effected my mental well being and left me questioning my sanity. Comments that left my family feeling unable to support my decisions in fear of my safety. it was a meeting that left me feeling isolated.

Here I sat after coming full circle with the same women but this time I was a different woman. I am a now a woman who has had the most amazing journey and have achieved some incredible things;

I gave birth, not only did I give birth but I bloody rocked that labour ward!

I came back and I told the story, I sang it from the rooftops!

I learnt to believe in me and my abilities.

I joined their MSLC and contributed to so many fantastic improvements within the Maternity service.

I have spoke at training events within maternity with an aim to improve maternity care for women.

I have written and had my views published here and in The Practising Midwife .

I have contributed to #MatExp campaign and connected with some fantastic people as a result.

I have met, received support and been inspired by many fantastic people. too many to mention.

The realisation that my shoes have climbed a mountain has happened!

I received the following email from a Consultant Obstetrician following the Whose Shoes event. It confirmed that this journey has been worth every little step:

“Dear Michelle,

I just wanted to reiterate how touched I was by your story and how impressed I was by the way you delivered it. You will be responsible for improving the practise of every obstetrician in that room today which in the end will improve the care of tens of thousands of women.

If anyone is amazing it is you!”

This is one of many mountains.

I hope to be climbing a mountain near you soon.

 

Michelle Quashie

2016

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It is time to talk about the ‘perinatal’ aspect of Perinatal Mental Health (PMH): the ‘missing link’ in the national campaign

I am delighted to be able to publish today a guest blog for the #MatExp campaign from Mr Raja Gangopadhyay.  Raja is a Consultant Obstetrician and Gynaecologist with special area of clinical interest in Perinatal Mental Health (PMH) from West Hertfordshire Hospitals NHS Trust. He is a member of the Royal College of Obstetrician and Gynaecologist (RCOG).

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I would like to take this opportunity to share my views on why I feel so strongly about the role of the Maternity Services in Perinatal Mental Health (PMH).

Perinatal Mental Health (PMH) has two important components in its terminology: ‘Perinatal’ (period during pregnancy, delivery and post delivery) and ‘Mental Health’. Therefore the care of mums in the Maternity Services during this vital period is of utmost importance in PMH: it should be a no-brainer.

But sadly, PMH is the only one area of Maternal Health where I do not see a strong voice of the Maternity Services in the national campaign.

This has remained ‘Cinderella’ within Maternity Units in spite of the glaring facts:

  • PMH is still one of the leading causes of maternal death in the UK.

  • This is one of the most prevalent conditions mums suffer from during their pregnancy and postpartum period (at least 10% of mums suffering from this).

I strongly believe that without robust ‘perinatal’ care, women would continue to suffer and die from PMH illnesses, no matter how much we spend to expand specialist Mother and Baby Units (MBUs).

Therefore this is the time when we must recognise this important area and raise awareness.

I am trying to address this issue through my campaign on social media and as the Royal College of Obstetrician and Gynaecologist’s (RCOG) Representative to the Maternal Mental Health Alliance (MMHA).

What do I mean by PMH ‘within’ Maternity Services?

Suffering and deaths from PMH illnesses are often preventable if appropriate measures are taken during pregnancy and in the immediate postpartum period.

A prevalent health condition like PMH must be managed with the same readiness as managing other medical conditions in pregnancy such as diabetes, high blood pressure (pre-eclampsia) or heart disease.

The only way to ensure that the women with PMH are appropriately cared for according to the NICE guideline (2014) is to have:

  • A dedicated PMH team within every Maternity Service:

A Consultant Obstetrician, Specialist Midwife, a Perinatal Psychiatrist, a Specialist Psychiatry Nurse and a Paediatrician should jointly lead this service locally. The service should be easily accessible to the mums.

  • A dedicated Obstetric-Psychiatry Antenatal clinic

  • Communication with Community Team:

This Maternity Service should have clear links with GP, Health Visitor (HV), community MH Team, Liaison Psychiatry services, Mental Health Crisis Team, Children and Young People services, Peer Support groups and other charitable organisations.

  • Robust Care Pathway:

There should be a clear pathway for risk assessment (at the booking visit and at every consultation), early identification and treatment. There also should be provision of a multi-professional team meeting on a regular basis.

  • Dedicated specialist service and support:

For conditions such as PTSD / birth trauma, fear of pregnancy and child birth (‘tocophobia’), bereavement and support for mums and dads whose babies are admitted to NICU.

  • Pre-pregnancy advice service:

It is important to have specialist advice and support for women (with PMH illness/ traumatic experience in previous pregnancy) who are considering pregnancy.

  • Patient involvement : ‘Patients first and foremost’

PMH is an area where patients’ opinion must be considered in developing local care pathways. Services must be evaluated on a regular basis based on patient experience.

I firmly believe that all the health conditions should be treated in the same way with professional expertise and kindness and without any prejudice. I am not sure why we still classify health conditions into ‘physical’ and ‘mental’ when there is often an overlap.

Psychological care in pregnancy, delivery and beyond…

It is unfortunate that psychological care has remained a very neglected part within Maternity Services. The reason given for this is ‘the staff are too busy’.

However pregnancy is probably a period of life where psychological support from the HCPs is needed the most.

It is especially important when mums could potentially have severe stress during pregnancy and the postpartum period due to the following factors:

  • Previous history of miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, IVF, traumatic childbirth.

  • Any other family member or friend has had complicated childbirth experience.

  • Sudden life event such as breakdown in family relation/divorce, loss of employment, bereavement in the family or loved one, relocation/migration and domestic violence.

  • Sexual abuse in childhood or pregnancy as a result of sexual violence.

  • Associated pregnancy complications (for example premature rupture of membrane, high blood pressure, diabetes, concerns on baby’s growth or SPD).

PMH is not only PND and Puerperal Psychosis (PP)…

Many believe that PMH is a term equivalent to the care of Postnatal Depression (PND) and PP.

PMH includes specialised care for women (during pregnancy and one year after the childbirth) with any mental health condition (such as anxiety, depression, bipolar illness, schizophrenia, OCD, eating disorder, and personality disorders).

PMH must include bereavement care (miscarriage, still birth and neonatal death), traumatic birth experience/PTSD, support services for mums and dads whose babies are admitted to NICU and tocophobia (fear of pregnancy and childbirth).

Another important component should be the psychological care of mums and dads throughout the journey of pregnancy, delivery and postpartum period.

PMH, in my view, must be recognised as a separate subspecialty in the training of Obstetricians and Midwives.

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Why is identification in pregnancy and immediate postpartum period so important?

  • Effects of psychological stress in pregnancy:

There are now plenty of research results, which indicate the long-term impact of stress during pregnancy on the brain development of the baby while it is in mum’s womb. Prof Vivette Glover, an eminent Professor of Perinatal Psychology from Imperial College London, explains this: http://www.beginbeforebirth.org/for-schools/films#womb

Therefore timely intervention and adequate support during pregnancy can prevent long-term effects on the child.

  • Care Planning to prevent serious illness:

All pregnant women with risk factors to develop worsening mental health conditions should have a plan of care during delivery and postpartum period.

Confidential Enquiries into Maternal Deaths have repeatedly pointed out that in the majority of cases of deaths from suicide, there is a lack of care planning during pregnancy.

This is only possible through appropriate care within the Maternity Services and multiagency communication.

  • Enjoying the journey of pregnancy:

Experience of pregnancy and birth creates a lasting memory for the mums and dads for the years to come. Therefore this should be an enjoyable experience for the woman and her family to cherish in happiness in the future.

As HCPs our role is to ensure we support and empower women to make informed choices for the safety of her and the baby and most important of all a very positive birth experience.

  • Helping mums to make informed decision regarding medications:

Mums should get proper advice regarding the use of medication in pregnancy and after delivery.

Pregnancy is a short window but an excellent opportunity to address health conditions.

  • Bonding and attachment:

PMH conditions can adversely affect the bonding with the baby and the mum.

‘A stitch in time saves nine’: Prevention of serious PMH illnesses is only possible through good care in Maternity Services.

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Having discussed the importance of the role of Maternity Services in PMH, now let us find out what is happening in the Maternity Units……

A journey of revelations…

I contacted many Maternity Units across the country to find out the provision of PMH services within their Units. What I found was extraordinary.

I raised my concerns in a letter published in The Guardian: http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/oct/14/perinatal-mental-health-provision-badly-lacking .

I raised this issue with the Maternity Review Team, during my meeting in September (2015).

Although there are examples of good service, the overall structure within the Maternity Units is very poor:

  • Often there is no dedicated Lead Obstetrician and/or Specialist PMH midwife

  • Many Units do not have formal debriefing services (for traumatic birth experience), specialist bereavement midwives and support system for parents with babies admitted to NICU.

  • There are hardly any dedicated services for women with fear of childbirth.

Delving deep into the challenges….

To have a better understanding of the need, I embarked on a journey to meet professionals from all the relevant Royal Colleges (RCOG, RCM, RCPsych, RCGP), Health Visitor organisations, Maternal Mental Health Alliance (MMHA), MPs and All Party Parliamentary Group (APPG), NHS England, CCGs and other national Campaign Groups.

It was revealed that overall there is very little understanding of the vital role of the Maternity Services in PMH.

Thankfully RCM is campaigning for a Specialist Midwife in every Maternity Unit.

But the main barriers are the following:

  • Lack of Mapping of the existing services in PMH within Maternity Units (such as the MMHA map of the available Perinatal Psychiatry services).

  • Lack of a national standard of the service provision within Maternity Units (according to the number of deliveries and complexity of cases).

  • Poor collaborative work among HCPs: as often the Maternity Electronic record system is not accessible to other HCPs and vice versa.

  • Lack of standard Training programme for the Obstetricians and the Midwives.

  • Lack of adequate focus on PMH illnesses in Antenatal Education.

I have concerns that unless these issues are resolved appropriately, we cannot provide the best quality of care for women with PMH illnesses.

With the best of my abilities, I am currently working closely with other national organisations to address these areas.

Maternity HCPs: Please, please do something and don’t wait for things to happen….

Charles Dickens

It is true that funding is necessary to set up specialised PMH services and Mother and Baby Units (MBU). However Maternity Units should not wait for the approval of their business cases.

In my humble opinion, funding is not everything. Our professional values are the most important factors in patient care:

  • Kindness:

Simple measures such as a smile, empathy and a willingness to listen to the concerns of the mums and dads could make a huge difference in patient experience.

  • Communication:

Take every opportunity to explain the situation and ensure that appropriate wording is used during communication.

  • Continuity of care:

Try to ensure continuity whenever possible or communicate adequately with the rest of your team.

  • Local Alliance:

Please try to develop Local Alliances with Community Midwives, Health Visitors, GPs, all available community mental health services, Peer Support groups and children’s services.

This could significantly improve communication among the multi-agency teams in caring for mums with PMH illnesses.

  • Listen to concerns:

Please create opportunities to listen to the concerns of the user group. This may be in the form of promoting your local Maternity Service Liaison Committee (MSLC) or Patient Panels.

If possible, please read the real life stories of the Lived Experiences on the Internet: it would help you to think ‘outside the box’, have a better insight into the PMH illnesses and give you inspiration.

  • Raise awareness:

Arrange patient engagement events, Road shows or Community Events with local CCGs.

Participate in Social Media support, such as #PNDHour (Wednesday 8-9pm) and #BirthTraumaChat (Monday 8-9pm):

This would help to raise awareness, remove stigma and give mums and dads a ray of hope.

  • Arrange training on PMH:

Please ensure all staff are adequately trained in your local Units.

  • Get involved in your Regional PMH network:

Many regions now have regional PMH Networks. This could be an important place for information sharing among the Maternity Units.

  • Please do not forget dads:

There is now good evidence to support that dads can suffer from PTSD/PND. Please take every opportunity to support and communicate with dads.

  • Keep yourself updated:

PMH is a rapidly evolving area; therefore HCPs must keep their knowledge and skills up-to-date through continuous professional development.

If unsure, please seek help and escalate to your senior colleagues: an unsafe advice from a HCP could endanger an invaluable life.

Working together to make a difference…

We ALL need to work together to prevent suffering and death from PMH illnesses.

If you have any suggestions for improving PMH services within Maternity Units, I would be very keen to know (Twitter: @RajaGangopadhyay3).

If you are involved in good projects locally or are aware of any good practice, please share with everyone through #MatExp.

Acknowledgement

I am grateful to #MatExp for giving me this opportunity to write this blog.

I am immensely grateful to all the Lived Experiences for sharing their stories, which have enriched my knowledge on PMH much more than any textbook and journal article.

My thoughts are with all the bereaved families who have lost their loved ones due to this dreadful illness.

Raja Gangopadhyay

2015

 

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Safety, Experience, or Both?

A blog post from #MatExp co-founder Florence Wilcock.

Flo

There has been much discussion recently about safety within maternity services including a discussion on #MatExp Facebook group. A particular issue that bothers me is the idea that safety and experience might be two separate and mutually exclusive issues and it is this thought that drives me to write today.

Safety is paramount. The purpose of maternity services is to provide safe care through the journey of pregnancy and early newborn life. Every appointment in the NICE pathway is designed to screen for potential problems and ensure they are managed effectively. Every healthcare worker know this is the aim. The 20 week ‘anomaly’ scan might be considered the time to discover the sex of your baby if you wish and to get some photos but the medical purpose is to ensure the baby is growing well, with no abnormalities and to check where the placenta is localised to exclude placenta praevia (low lying placenta) which can cause life threatening bleeding.

But there is more to pregnancy and becoming a parent than safety isn’t there? I am currently reading Atul Gawande ‘Being Mortal’ where he eloquently demonstrates that keeping elderly people ‘safe’ is not enough, there is more to life and living than safety alone. He describes a number of times when giving elderly people purpose such as a plant or animal to look after or more freedom to live the way they wish despite disability it makes a significant difference to their wellbeing. Sometimes this path may deemed ‘less safe’ but for that individual may make all the difference. This comes back to choice. Safety & choice can be tricky ones to combine successfully.

This does not mean I am belittling safety. As a consultant obstetrician it falls to me to talk to couples when the worst has happened and their baby has died. I also care for women who have had unexpectedly life threatening complications. I know I am with them during probably some of the darkest hours they will ever experience. I cannot pretend to understand how they feel but I do know I have been part of those intimate moments of grief and with some families that has followed through into supporting them sometimes for years. As a hospital we have a robust process of incident reporting and the feedback from a Serious Incident investigation (SI) again will sometimes fall to me. In some cases there is nothing that we think could have been done differently in some cases I have to sit and tell an anguished couple that we have failed them and that maybe things could have been different. It is a devastating thing to do, there is absolutely nothing that can be said that will make the situation better. It feels as if you have personally taken their existing despair and dragged them into an even more unthinkable place and the only thing you can say is ‘sorry’ which feel hopelessly inadequate and trite for such a situation.

So if I could guarantee safety I would in a flash but it is not that simple. Maternity care is delivered by people and unfortunately to err is human. We cannot design a system free of risk because however hard we try the variable of human error gets in the way. We can introduce systems that help minimise the impact of these errors but we can’t eliminate them. My favourite analogy for risk management is James Reason’s model of Swiss cheese. The event only happens when the holes in the ‘cheese’ line up the rest of the time the barriers put in place prevent the error. An example in maternity care might be the introduction of what we call ‘fresh eyes’. A midwife looking after a woman on electronic fetal heart monitoring might misinterpret this or not see the subtle changes over time if she has it in front of her constantly. ‘Fresh eyes’ means another midwife or obstetrician comes and looks at the trace on an hourly basis. This means if unusually the first midwife has made an error there is a system that means it is more likely to be corrected.

The concept of a ‘No Blame’ culture is another example designed to minimise human error. The idea that if one sees or makes an error one should report it without fear so that learning can be gained from it. It may be the learning will be the need for some individual training but equally it might be something totally different. If staff are fearful of consequences then under reporting might be the result and safety gaps may not be identified. Encouraging openness about mistakes and errors is vital but difficult. In maternity it isn’t as if we can just operate our way out of this problem .We know the huge rise in Caesareans sections in the last 30 years has not improved the outcomes for babies but has instead cause maternal health problems. So in maternity as other medical specialties we have to constantly refresh and re-invent what we are doing to try and improve safety. As obstetricians we tread a difficult path trying constantly to call correctly just the right amount of intervention at just the right time.

BirthJourneys

So where does experience fit in I hear you ask? There is abundant published evidence of positive association of patient experience with clinical safety and effectiveness, in other words if your patients (or I prefer users) are having positive experiences then you are running a safer service. It’s hardly surprising if we communicate and explain things to women and their families that we will be more likely to communicate effectively to other members of the multidisciplinary team. If we are open and honest then woman can challenge assumptions and make sure we haven’t missed something critical, a woman knows her own history inside out whereas we might omit a key point. To me one of the most shocking things that was said at our ‘Whose shoes’ #MatExp workshop last year was that women can feel intimidated and unable to ask questions. Trust and understanding between health professionals and those we care for are vital. We cannot possibly hope to improve safety in isolation, experience has to improve too.

There are two specific elements of #MatExp of which I think epitomise the safety -experience overlap. The first is an on-going ever growing constructive conversation between women, families, obstetricians, midwives, health visitors, paediatricians, families and anyone involved in maternity services. Only by tackling the difficult conversations without hierarchy in an equal and respectful way can we improve maternity care. Listening and talking to one another is critical not only as we work with women but in dissolving those barriers and difficulties that sometime exist between different professionals. Flattening of hierarchy, team work and the ability of anyone to challenge is a well-recognised component of a safety culture. We are doing this both locally using the workshops and board game and more broadly via social media and the website.

The second element of #MatExp is that personal sense of responsibility to take action. Own what you are doing and why you are doing it. ‘Wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it’ that doesn’t mean leave it to someone else. It means that health professionals and women can take action and influence maternity experience up and down the country and through that impact on and improve the safety of maternity care. So in final answer to my question I do not think it is a choice safety or experience I believe the two are fundamentally intertwined. So what will you do to improve #MatExp?

What will

Florence Wilcock, 2015

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“I was told I was going to have a big baby….” And then what happened?

A while ago on a Facebook birth forum I saw the phrase “you won’t grow a baby too big for you to birth”. It was a familiar phrase as it was something I would hear regularly on the homebirth e-group I was a member of back in 2010 when I was pregnant with my first. Back then I accepted it as the truth, but having been involved in #MatExp for nearly a year I have learned that few things to do with birth are that simple. So I asked the question on the #MatExp Facebook group:

Big Baby Capture

What followed was a fascinating discussion. Information was shared from lots of different quarters, and evidence was linked to. Experienced birth practitioners shared their views and a few themes started to appear. All along I knew I was intending to write up the discussion as a blog post so I was trying to keep up with the information and understand what was being said. As I opened up links to studies, trials, journal articles and so on my heart sank as I am not the best at analysing that kind of thing and it seemed at first glance that the evidence shared was somewhat contradictory. So I was concerned that I would end up inadvertently talking rubbish in this post.

And then I realised that this is exactly the problem. I am a woman of childbearing age who has had an education to degree level, English is my first language and I discuss birth and maternity pretty much every day. When we talk about informed choice we mean sharing all of the evidence plus the benefit of experience with pregnant women and their families, so that they can go through it and make their own decisions. Yet if I were writing this today as a woman who had been told she was likely to have a “big” baby I would be confused. And a little scared.

So it’s a good job I didn’t know any of this when I confidently went on to give birth to my 8lbs 13oz son on all fours on our bathroom floor.

From http://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/
From http://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/

Let’s pretend for a moment that I am in my third trimester and have been told by my midwife that she suspects baby is going to be a big ‘un. Probably a bouncing 9lbs tot. Before I go down the route of “doing” anything about that, or amending my birth plans, I have asked the #MatExp group for some information. What have I discovered?

Well, firstly we need to know a little bit more about this fictitious me. Do I have gestational diabetes? Am I classed as overweight? No? Okay then, we can stick with our issue being only the predicted size of my baby and keep questions of GD and BMI for another day if we may. Similarly, we will assume that I am physically able. So why are people sucking their teeth and looking concerned that baby might be of a generous size?

This is where we come to shoulder dystocia. “Shoulder dystocia is when the baby’s head has been born but one of the shoulders becomes stuck behind the mother’s pubic bone, delaying the birth of the baby’s body. If this happens, extra help is usually needed to release the baby’s shoulder. In the majority of cases, the baby will be born promptly and safely.” (From https://www.rcog.org.uk/en/patients/patient-leaflets/shoulder-dystocia/

In the majority of cases, the baby will be born promptly and safely?  So what’s all the fuss about then?  Well let’s look at this passage from the abstract of this article:

“Shoulder dystocia remains an unpredictable obstetric emergency, striking fear in the hearts of obstetricians both novice and experienced. While outcomes that lead to permanent injury are rare, almost all obstetricians with enough years of practice have participated in a birth with a severe shoulder dystocia and are at least aware of cases that have resulted in significant neurologic injury or even neonatal death. This is despite many years of research trying to understand the risk factors associated with it, all in an attempt primarily to characterize when the risk is high enough to avoid vaginal delivery altogether and prevent a shoulder dystocia, whose attendant morbidities are estimated to be at a rate as high as 16–48%. The study of shoulder dystocia remains challenging due to its generally retrospective nature, as well as dependence on proper identification and documentation. As a result, the prediction of shoulder dystocia remains elusive, and the cost of trying to prevent one by performing a cesarean delivery remains high. While ultimately it is the injury that is the key concern, rather than the shoulder dystocia itself, it is in the presence of an identified shoulder dystocia that occurrence of injury is most common.

The majority of shoulder dystocia cases occur without major risk factors. Moreover, even the best antenatal predictors have a low positive predictive value. Shoulder dystocia therefore cannot be reliably predicted, and the only preventative measure is cesarean delivery.”

Ah, okay.  So whilst MOST cases are not a problem, when there is a problem it can be very serious.  And most experienced obstetricians will have seen this happen, inevitably influencing their perception of the risks involved.  The teeth sucking is a bit more understandable now.

Apparently if I have a small pelvis it is more likely that baby will get his shoulders stuck. How do you know if you have a small pelvis? Small compared to what or whom? I have no idea but it appears to be a consideration.  One birth professional observed that “to me that ‘big’ is subjective in a lot of cases. A 7lb baby could be big to one woman whereas a 10lb baby could be average to another. There needs to be far more than just the picture provided by a (often inaccurate) scan. Woman’s own birthweight for example, her stature etc.” It was mentioned that pelvimetry used to be widely used but has been abandoned in favour of scans, due to a Cochrane review that found these measurements did more harm than good.

There is a higher likelihood of shoulder dystocia in bigger babies, that much is undisputed. Yet the language used when discussing this risk makes a big difference to how a pregnant woman might view the risk.  Contrasted with the passage above is this from Evidence-Based Birth:

Death capture

I suspect as with so many birth choices, women are likely to get the reassuring language from midwives who have confidently dealt with many instances of stuck shoulders, and more wary language from obstetricians who have seen first hand what can go tragically wrong.  

So in summary shoulder dystocia is more likely in bigger babies but on the whole it can’t be predicted and can usually be dealt with. It turns out that there are arbitrary cut offs for recommending Caesarean to prevent SD – 5kg in a non-diabetic woman. That means nothing to me but a quick Google tells me that is an 11lbs baby. My hypothetical nine pounder doesn’t warrant an automatic recommendation for a c-section then. So far so good.

But what position is my baby in? This is an important factor. I would argue that all pregnant women should be aware of foetal positioning and how to optimise it, but in this case it is particularly important as a malpositioned big baby could cause trouble. Let’s assume though that I have been on spinningbabies.com, haven’t been reclining on the sofa, have been doing headstands for nine months or whatever it is that is recommended. Baby is now head down and engaged and we’re ready for the off.

At this point it’s good to know that there is no evidence to suggest that it hurts more to give birth to a big baby. I cannot comment as my firstborn is the only child I have birthed vaginally so have nothing to compare it to. But the midwives on the group have been reassuring that being predicted a “big” baby does not mean increased pain in labour. Good stuff.

What I haven’t done (but what might have been recommended to me) – I have not had a growth scan. It appears that growth scans should be used to identify small babies (a discussion for another day no doubt) but not big ones. One group member commented “Ultrasound scans become increasingly unreliable the further along in pregnancy they are performed. Weight is an ESTIMATION can be up to 25% out either way. They base it on the abdominal circumference, head circumference & femur length – try doing it with yourself & see how accurate it is!”  

A birth professional went on to say “Growth scans are pretty hopeless in the third trimester – the only thing that is useful is a regular plotting of growth to try to identify a sudden growth spurt that could indicate a problem. A one off growth scan late on in pregnancy basically just leads to unhelpful fears on all sides.”

Which begs the question, how do we identify the potential 11lbs babies who “require” a c-section birth?

So I haven’t allowed anyone to worry me further with a most likely inaccurate scan reading. We think baby is going to be big but not so big that I am going to be encouraged to have an elective c-section, so I’m happy to go ahead with my vaginal birth.

This is where we come to the issue that dominated the discussion. The position that women labour in can make a HUGE difference to the outcome when they are birthing a large baby. Labouring on their back is most likely to be unhelpful. Labouring on all fours is most likely to enable them to birth without intervention. Certainly my experience – I could not bear to be in any position other than kneeling up for my entire labour, simply could not bear it. Lying down was absolutely out of the question.

One group member had a wealth of information to contribute and commented “There’s plenty of evidence to support programs like birth ball use, not just gentle bouncing but using as a structured exercise plus also designing maternity units/rooms to encourage movement and position changes and upright movement.”

A midwife explained “I worked with a lovely obstetrician a few years ago (I have worked with many wonderful obstetricians). She was leading the skills and drills component for obstetric emergencies of the yearly mandatory training. We were practicing what to do in the case of a shoulder dystocia with a mannequin. She looked at me and said, of course we all know that if we do this (turning the model over in to what would be an all fours position) we wouldn’t have to be doing this at all.”

And one of our obstetricians added “in terms of labour progression, size is not nearly so important as baby’s positioning and flexion.”

The impact of pain relief was also mentioned:Of course this is impacted by maternal position too, often compounded by an epidural that softens the pelvic floor muscles reducing the baby’s ability to rotate on the pelvic floor.”

Let’s recap. My midwife has said that it is her experienced opinion that I am going to have a big baby. I have declined a growth scan but we are both confident that baby won’t be topping 11lbs. So we’re going for a vaginal birth, and have done everything we can to ensure baby is in a good position. I am then being encouraged to be active in labour, labour on all fours and so on. There is no reason to believe that I will experience more pain due to baby’s size. There is an elevated risk of shoulder dystocia but my birth team are trained to deal with that. Hmm, okay, on reflection I would make the same choice I made back in 2011 when I hadn’t had this conversation. Home waterbirth with experienced midwives please! Especially, for me as an individual, “big” babies are normal – I was 9lbs 11oz at birth myself.

Does the above sound like the experience most women have when a big baby is predicted? Let’s ask some real life women shall we? Here I am indebted to the fabulous women on my other Facebook group who have shared their stories with me.

I was told I would have a big baby. The midwife measured me way off the chart at 36 or 38 weeks can’t remember which. Went for growth scan. Again measured me pretty big. Appointment with consultant, he measured me big. Straight aways did a growth scan. I was then booked in for an induction the following week. Was in from the 25th and had him on 29th (due on 5th July) he was only 8lb 2oz.” What was the reason for the induction? “Not sure. They said as it was my first I probably would go over so as he was measuring big now it could be more of an issue in 3 or 4 weeks.”

My 1st baby was 9lb 14oz and got stuck with shoulder dystocia and born with the ventouse.” And what positions were you labouring in with baby no. 1? Were you on all fours at all?  “No! I believe position/ventouse were what caused her to be stuck! I was dehydrated so they made me stay in the bed on my back to be monitored!”

“I was told my little boy was a big baby and I had to have a growth scan. I was then induced a week early due to his size. He weighed 8lb 15oz and I had a 4th degree tear and had to be rushed to theatre.” What did they say were the risks with him being big? Did they explain why they wanted to induce you?  “The explanation for me being induced was if I was left and went over I would have had a tough time, but looking back now I wish I had opted out of being induced as I blame that for the complications.”

I was measuring big for dates at my midwife appointments from about 24 weeks. I was eventually sent for a scan to rule out polyhydraminos at about 32 weeks. The scan results were ok and showed that my baby’s measurements were on the 95th centile. I was then changed to higher risk consultant led care. They told me it was due to the baby’s size and the increased need for intervention during delivery, e.g. forceps, etc. My baby was predicted to be 9lb 9oz maximum and she was actually 10lb 6oz. I was in slow labour for 6 days. I had to have an oxytocin drip to get me from 7cm but I couldn’t get passed 8cm as her big shoulders meant her head wouldn’t press down on my cervix! As a result of being on the drip, I wasn’t able to get in different positions in labour and was mainly confined to the bed. I then had an emergency c-section due to failure to progress.” How did all the talk of having a “big” baby affect how confident you felt in being able to give birth?  “To be honest, it did affect how confident I felt giving birth. I was then very nervous at the prospect of tearing or that I’d have difficulties during the birth and would need forceps, etc. I was very worried that something would go wrong. To be honest, I felt very relieved when the consultant said I needed a c-section.” 

I commented that I wondered whether that was the reason the mum above struggled to dilate. Rather than failure to progress perhaps her caregivers should be have been labelled with “failure to encourage”.

There was one rather different story, although the mum in question was surprised by how her consultant’s advice varied from what others were experiencing: Was told based on my daughter being 10lb that my little boy would be big. The midwife referred me to a consultant as my fundal height was bigger than even my little girl was! Tested me for GD which I didn’t have. Consultant said he was going to do absolutely nothing about it which varied massively from my peers at nearby hospitals who were being induced early. He said inducing a large baby is dangerous as they’re more likely to get stuck and if I got my little girl out this one would be fine! Bit worried but I trusted him.”

And what of those women who had not been told to expect a big baby?

“I had a 9lb 4oz baby but wasn’t expecting him to be ‘big’ I had a tiny bump and was told he was only going to be about 7lb.  I had him naturally with no complications at all. A few stitches externally but that was all.”

“My 2nd baby was 9lbs 6oz and no one knew he would be that big as my first was 7lb 11oz. Labour was very quick and vaginally delivered with 1 stitch.”

If 9lb2oz is classed as a big baby then mine was! He was 13 days over so probably wouldn’t have been so big if I’d gone on time. Nobody told me he was going to be big at any of the extra monitoring appts I had the week before he arrived all on his own, no help, drugs or hospital. I did tear slightly but midwife was happy for me not to go to hospital if I didn’t want to.”

I wasn’t told I was going to have a big baby, I was tested for diabetes at one point because my bump had grown quite quickly but I didn’t have it. My little boy weighed 9lb 15oz, I was in labour for 6 and a half hours and didn’t have any complications. I had a few stitches afterwards but nothing major.”

What can we say in conclusion?  When a baby is identified as potentially being “big” are all families given the information that we have discussed here?  Do all birth professionals agree with the general thrust of this post or have some important points been missed or misrepresented? And if I have got it all wrong what does that say for the idea of “informed choice”?  Because this is my best understanding of the issues following a detailed discussion with experienced birth professionals.  There are plenty of other birth stories from the mums on my group which make it clear that women are routinely being encouraged down the route of induction without fully understanding why, only that baby is going to be “big” and that is some kind of a problem.  And so many of these stories end in instrumental deliveries, emergency c-sections and, at worst, traumatic births.  Would it not be preferable for women to have the issues fully explained to them and to be encouraged to have an active birth where, in all likelihood, they will be capable of giving birth to their child?

I am just glad that my “big” baby is here, safe and well, and now in his second week at primary school.  Decisions always seem simple in hindsight.

Big Baby

Some of the links that were shared as part of the discussion not already linked to above:

Shoulder Dystocia – RCOG green top guidelines

Rebozo Technique for Foetal Malposition in Labour

The Effect of Birth Ball Exercises during Pregnancy on Mode of Delivery

Reducing Length of Labour and Caesarean Surgery Rate Using a Peanut Ball for Women Labouring with an Epidural

After Shoulder Dystocia: Managing the Subsequent Pregnancy and Delivery

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